How to Combine Finances as Newlyweds

If you’re a newlywed or getting married soon, it’s time to start talking with your significant other about money. Super romantic, we know, but listen: Being on the same page about money is a key part of having a successful marriage. It sets you up for financial security today and into your golden years together!

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When you say “I do,” you’re committing to every part of each other—including your finances. So put combining your finances on the to-do list.

Need some help? Let’s talk about how to combine your finances as after marriage.

Why Talk About Money?

Before we jump into the steps of combining your finances, let’s talk about why this is important. Money is one of the top issues married couples fight about. And according to our research, a little over half of married couples (56%) say they never had a serious conversation about money before getting married. That’s crazy!

Getting on the same page now doesn’t mean you’ll never have hard conversations in the future—but it will help you avoid fighting about money because you’ll be going in the same direction. Talking about money helps you lay the groundwork for a healthy marriage that stands the test of time. As a matter of fact, we discovered that married adults who rate their marriages as “great” were more likely to have had conversations about money before saying “I do.”

Remember, when you get married, you become we. It’s a big shift. And talking about money forces the two of you to discuss really important issues—like goals, dreams, how you want to retire, and what legacy you hope to leave. 

“Not hers, his, mine, yours—only OURS,” said Kelly, a member of the Ramsey Baby Steps Community on Facebook. “It doesn’t matter whose name is on the bill. It’s OURS and US only. You’ll be saying ‘we,’ not ‘you’ or ‘me.’”

These conversations build a shared vision in your marriage—which makes you more financially secure and stronger in your relationship. (P.S. Don’t wait until you’re pronounced husband and wife to have that first money talk. Here are 12 questions to ask before marriage.)

How to Combine Your Finances

The process of combining your finances doesn’t have to add stress to your wedding planning or ruin your newlywed bliss. It won’t be as fun as snorkeling in the reef or backpacking through Europe together—but you could still make a date of it. Light some candles, turn on your favorite romantic playlist, and dig in (to some spreadsheets).

Here’s a quick six-step checklist to help you combine your finances:

1. Be honest.
2. Open joint bank accounts.
3. Update bills and beneficiaries.
4. Make a plan for your financial future.
5. Start budgeting together.
6. Always put your relationship first.

1. Be Honest

Transparency is key! Be open and honest about your current individual situations. List your income, debt, assets—everything. Don’t hide any accounts or other valuables from each other.

Don’t forget to put all your views on money on the table too. Figure out your money tendencies (for example: Are you a spender or saver? Do you prefer safety or status?) and talk about how they affect your money habits.

You might want to discuss what your parents taught you about money and what you do and don’t agree with—kindly, of course. Don’t be critical or judgmental if you disagree. Learn how to communicate effectively with your spouse.

2. Open Joint Bank Accounts

When you get married, you’ve got to combine your money into joint accounts (checking and savings). You’re becoming one, so your finances should too. If you keep this one area separated, it can lead to separation in other areas. Don’t go there. Work together from shared accounts to create accountability, honesty and a sense that you’re in this together! Because guess what? You are!

If you and your new spouse bank at different institutions, choose the one with the best perks and lowest fees—or better yet, choose a completely new bank and start fresh. Don’t feel bad about breaking up with your old bank . . . you’ve only got eyes for your spouse now. But if your new spouse has an old debt to pay off with that old bank, you’ll need to hold off closing that account until you pay off that debt.

Joint vs. Hybrid

Now some couples try to have it both ways—using shared accounts and separate accounts in their own names. They say they want to share some (if not most) of their money but still want a separate account for their individual fun money or savings goals.

But those couples are setting themselves up for disaster. Remember, you are now one. Everything is out in the open, and a separate account the other person doesn’t have access to just screams secrecy. Is your spouse going to buy something big without consulting you? Are they squirreling money away to something you don’t want them to?

 

You won’t feel like a complete team unless you share everything. And let’s be honest . . . sharing accounts is just easier—and we’re all looking for ways to make life easier, right?

3. Update Bills and Beneficiaries

Once you have all your money combined into shared accounts, it’s time to update everything that your accounts are attached to. That means all your bills, subscriptions, direct deposits, loan payments, debit cards (no credit cards here!), etc. It’s usually pretty easy to do—just go online and edit your info or go into a bank branch and do it in person.

You need to make sure to update everything that draws from an account or else you might have to pay late fees or deal with interruptions in service. Aaron, another member of the Ramsey Baby Steps Community, had a pretty smart way to keep track of all the stuff to update for his new joint account with his wife.

“Once the joint account was open and active with our direct deposits going into it, we made a shared iPhone note called an ‘Account Switch List,’” Aaron said. “We listed out, by category, every possible bill/utility, every debt account, and every payment account that needed to be switched to the new joint account. This helped us make sure nothing got left in the dust.”

You also need to update any beneficiaries—the people you designate to get your money if you die. This means insurance policies, retirement accounts—things like that. Whoever your beneficiary was before (your mom, a sibling, maybe a niece or nephew) needs to get replaced by (you guessed it) your spouse. Makes sense, right? And don’t forget about changing the beneficiary on your will (or if you don’t have one, make one together).

4. Make a Plan for Your Financial Future

Once everything is on the table, it’s time to make money goals together, as a team. Figure out what Baby Step you’re on—as a couple. If you were on Baby Step 4, but your new bride is on Baby Step 2, then guess what? You’re on Baby Step 2 now! 

But that’s all right. You love this person with all your heart, and you’re planning on sharing all of your future together—the good, the bad, the debt, all of it. 

Set priorities together and make a plan to move through the Baby Steps together. Take a finance course like Financial Peace University at your local church so you can know how to set and tackle all these money goals as one. 

5. Start Budgeting Together

Before you get married, you should already start talking budgets. You shouldn’t combine your accounts or budgets completely, but some trial runs to see how you’ll budget together is a great idea. 

Once you’re married, you’ll start budgeting together for real. Every dollar of your incomes—every month. Make sure it happens by putting a date on the calendar each month for your budget meeting.

Don’t skip this step. Creating a budget as a couple is how you make your money goals actually happen.

6. Always Put Your Relationship First

If you want a satisfying relationship, you have to make your finances—and working on them together—a priority from the start. Couples who agree about money and have healthy finances almost always have a better marriage overall.

In fact, lots of couples find that being on the same page about money improves all aspects of their relationship. Like Dave Ramsey says, “When you can talk about money, you can talk about anything.” Money comes with baggage and can make us all uncomfortable sometimes—but working through that past and setting goals together is how you grow stronger in the now and in the future.

And to help keep you and your spouse on the same page with your money, you should check out the EveryDollar app—your one-stop shop to keep track of your money and make sure you’re on target for those long-term goals. EveryDollar is both a budgeting app and a coach, pumped full of three decades of time-tested Ramsey teachings that keep you and your spouse focused on winning with money—no matter which Baby Step you’re starting on.

So download EveryDollar today and get started building that budget (and your life) together.